Four Horsemen of Herd Immunity
Foreword: A Nation Bewitched by Podcasts and Pseudoscience
“The greatest threat to public health is an unchecked ego with a platform and a sponsor.”
— From the Surgeon General’s Secret Diary, vol. III
We live in an age where microphones outnumber microscopes. A guest spot on Rogan carries more influence than peer review, and ivermectin flows freer than logic.
This is not satire. We wish it were.
The apocalypse wears earbuds and takes supplements.
Tract I: The Harbinger — Joe Rogan, Rider of Influence
"Who needs a medical degree when you have Spotify?"
He arrived not on horseback, but on a podcast feed — a friendly voice asking “just questions,” trailing plumes of confusion and creatine. Joe Rogan, the Harbinger, bears no scalpel, no peer-reviewed citation, only a studio and an audience ready to believe the guy from Fear Factor.
From his microphone flows a strange brew: distrust of institutions, fascination with fringe theories, and a libertarian fog thick enough to cancel any mask mandate.
“I’m not a doctor,” he reminds you — before explaining virology, immunology, and public policy to millions.
And yet, his power lies in the shrug: “I don’t know, man…” is not a disclaimer. It’s a spell. One that leaves facts trembling, and truth somewhere beneath a pile of kettlebells, steroids and DMT.
🔮 Next: A Pale Rider Approaches, clutching expired studies and a grudge against mercury.
Tract II: The Rider of Paranoia — David Geier
To be continued...
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